What You Need To Know About Dating A Doctor In Residency

Like a musician or a composer, when you become serious with the man, you share him with his musical passion. This is what happens should you decide to date a physician. One of several reasons why dating a doctor in residency is different from dating a businessperson or a blue-collar worker. 

Dating is a challenge, to begin with, and dating a doctor in residency is a completely different experience. In my other articles in this series, I talked about my experiences dating a Libra man, dating an Aquarius man, dating a Leo man, and men falling under all the astrological signs. My experience in dating a doctor in residency was unlike anything I experienced before!

dating a doctor

You need to be creative with time management. Some weeks, his schedule will be normal and predictable. But then there can be a string of weeks, even months, where it feels like you’ll never see him at all. Patience and understanding are needed. Otherwise, his medical residency will take a negative toll on your relationship. 

Sometimes you may ask yourself why you began to date a doctor in residency because the idea of dating a doctor is rather sexy. However, there is a big difference. A resident physician is still in training, although he is a doctor. His responsibilities are far more extensive than a medical doctor that has his residency years behind him. Before you commit to a serious dating of a doctor in residency, take a look at these pros and cons. 

PRO: Doctors are empathetic and Caring

There was a time when the education of doctors in residency focused mostly on doctor skills and testing the doctor’s skills. In the past 10 years, though, there has been a shift. Interpersonal skills and learning patience when treating a patient is as important as the skills needed to improve a patient’s health. When you date a resident doctor, you’ll see that training when you spend time with him. He’s concerned about you, and he wants to be assured that you like the food and you’re having a good time. The level of caring was a lot like the concern shown by the Taurus man I dated.

CON: Doctors in Residency are very busy

After he graduates medical school, your date has the initials “M.D.” after his name for the rest f his life. But he’s not yet ready to work as a doctor in his own office or as part of a medical team.

The newly-minted doctor goes to work with an attending physician who serves as his mentor. He will often be one of several under the tutoring of the physician. The training is often held at a hospital when the doctors in residency go from one patient room to the next and are tested on their knowledge of patient diagnoses. You can visit the doctor in residency you’re dating at the hospital when his mentor is gone. But you will find him walking through the hospital, checking on patients, and filling out paperwork.

PRO: A Doctor in Residency is Career-Oriented and Driven to Succeed

No matter what specialty a doctor in residency decides on, he’ll work hard to get good at it. Then, after his residency is over, he’ll earn a salary generous enough to live on easily.

While you’ll have financial peace of mind if you choose to marry a doctor in residency, his main focus is on succeeding in his chosen specialty during his residency years. While it may not seem like he’s concerned about you, the fact is he thinks about you all the time because you are his inspiration. You give him a reason to succeed: he’ll have you, and most likely, you’ll have children together.

CON: He’ll enter the medical field with tremendous student loan debt

The doctor in residency you love will start paying off his student loan debt once he graduates medical school. The total cost of his education can be in the hundreds of thousands of dollars. He will allocate a part of the small income he receives as a resident doctor to pay off his debt. 

When you date a doctor in residency, likely, you won’t go to the fanciest restaurants, nor will he be able to give you extravagant, expensive presents. If he proposes to you, the engagement ring will not be the one he wants you to have, but it will be the one he’s able to afford. Dating a doctor in residency requires that you are okay with putting off rewards, vacations, and gift-giving until after he completes his residency. 

PRO: You’ll Have Free Medical Care

Should you sustain injury from exercise or falling, your doctor-boyfriend will be there to examine the injury and see how serious it is. If you fall ill, he can find the cause and guide you in the right direction for treatment.

Although your doctor in residency boyfriend may not like it, your whole family, parents, and siblings will be examined the same as you. However, don’t ever allow the treatment your boyfriend or fiancé gives you to substitute for a medical professional specializing in the field. A doctor in residency can treat minor cuts and scrapes, a cold, or flu, but you’ll need to see an experienced physician to treat you for anything serious. 


The success or failure of a relationship with a doctor in residency depends on you. When you date a resident doctor, he will be very busy. And business equals faithfulness. He won’t have time to date and court another woman unless he sets the time aside for this purpose (nearly impossible to do). His days are long already, and he often works many consecutive days, so he has little time or energy. 

What kind of woman should date a doctor in residency? About 80% of physicians are married, and a significant amount is married to other healthcare professionals. This is because their girlfriend is also working exhausting hours, so there’s an implied understanding between them, and they can coordinate their schedule to spend time together. A physician exists in a different world than the one the country boy I dated lives in.

Not all doctors are married to other doctors, though. However, if you work in the health care field in any role, or if your job requires you to work long hours. It might be easier for you to accept that you won’t date a doctor in residency on any fixed schedule. Sao dating night will not be on the weekends. It may be early on a Tuesday morning, or Wednesday night, or Sunday afternoon. If you can do this, then expect a life of enjoyment and rewards should you marry a doctor in residency!

1 thought on “What You Need To Know About Dating A Doctor In Residency”

  1. I think how its referred to “he” for a physician in residency, yet always male…??? is ridiculous. Just saying I get its tied to a memory or instance with a man but when written in this format it could easily be made more “fluid” and I really hope I am saying all this correctly and DONOT offend anyone. I am a southern born and bred straight Texas woman who is finally finishing med school by age 43 so I do see things like this article/post that I feel are sexist-even if not being meant in that way. Meh. U get it. 😉


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